11 January 2010

checking in

it's past midnight...of course...
and i hop around checking in...
i've been thinking about cloth diapers like hays and wonder if i have any hippie in me or just that bit of gypsy that wanders. i wear leather bracelets so would that count? i should do a post about those magic jonny bracelets...but then you would all want one and it would stress me out.


dance begins tomorrow morning and i am excited and nervous.
i miss my little dancers and all their hugs.
i'm excited for them to see my belly because they will tell me it is huge.
(all the moms tell me i'm so small...and i get no sympathy for any discomfort.)
little girls are full of sympathy :)


i'm just a little nervous about these contractions that fill my days.
the doctor says it's fine.
this is my 5th pregnancy and 3rd child...braxton hicks can start early.
although i thought 21 weeks was pretty early for taking my breath away.
it's exhausting me and a bit frustrating because it slows me down.
i have a doctor appointment tomorrow too.
i'm worried i'm leaking.
promise...i know the difference and i'm not peeing my pants.
they will likely say i'm fine again...but what if...
what if the contractions are dilating me a bit and i am leaking?


i'm 28 weeks and i'm starting my 10 week countdown to the baby.
i'm fairly confident she will enter the world at 38 weeks like her sisters.
or sooner.
but we shall see.


we went shopping for her...
she has hot pink newborn jammies with panda bear footsies that scream
"my big sister is emi"
and she has the softest brightest polka-dot blankie with a lamb on it
that means "lynzee loves me"
i am still wondering how my girls found hot pink in the newborn isle.


this time is going to be so different.
i swear this little being inside of me recognizes the voices of her sisters.
their reading voices...and laughing silly voices...and yelling fighting voices too.
she moves for them.
like she's been watching and waiting to be with them.
i'm not sure that is possible at this point...but it's a sweet thought.


it's almost 1am.
bedtime.

3 comments:

Hayley said...

am. i love you. and i love your HUGE belly!

cloth diapers it is. i have started and love it so far...but i'm only on day 2.

xoxo. h

Allie said...

I get so excited when I find that you've posted!! You will get sympathy from me, and Alexa is so excited to see you today. Take it easy and be careful. The girls love you and you love them, but your baby wants to be here happy and healthy. The girls will understand...Love and hugs!

Kristin said...

Loved this post. Felt the burn in my eyes. I love the thought of your baby waiting, watching, wanting to be with her sisters. You looked darling last night--Ally was so excited to be back--though she is also sad knowing her time with you is almost over. She talks about that a lot. You've touched a lot of lives. Thanks for all you do.